“I have never really felt drawn to anyone.”
“It has been too long past to dream of love again.”
“No one has ever shown me that kind of attention.”
“I tried before, only to find it didn’t work.”
“Am afraid to be hurt again.”
Have you ever felt one of these heart cries? Did life seem to unfold a rosy dream, only to wake up in disillusionment? Has your soul wished there really was love – true and unchanging?
You’re not alone, for who at some point or other has not felt the tug and longing for someone to love, walk and share this life wife – a confidante, friend and companion?
Remember, first of all, that God who longs to fulfill your heart’s desires, is the One who calls your ask within the bounds of His will and good plan for your life. Yes, a happy married life is one of His carefully chosen gifts in your life. Like any other blessing, in here too, it is His will for you to receive nothing but His best for your life.
Here are some key questions that will help as a mariner’s guide and compass, to help steer you in the search to your God-given dream.
- Does this person have a heart for God? Have they been born-again, and believe in Christ as their Saviour? Is their faith first and utmost?
- Is every dream peripheral to their love for Christ? Does their world center around Him, and what is closest to His heart?
- Will this relationship further your God-given dreams, or does it alter your priorities, pushing away what you know is foremost into the background?
- Does this person honour, cherish and respect you enough to forgo immediate gratification, so greater joy and satisfaction may be your future?
- Do you trust them to honour your covenant?
- Do you share mutual dreams, passions and interests?
- Is conversation a joy, or is their conflict or abuse? Do you enjoy their presence in private, with family, in church, and among friends?
- Who are their heroes, mentors and friends? Do you trust the voices that influence them?
- Are they sincere, hard-working, and willing to learn and grow?
- Are they open and candid with you? Have they risen above past mistakes?
- Are they integrous and trustworthy? Are they humble and take responsibility for their actions?
- How does this person respond to others in need? Are they kind, generous and loving, especially when no one is watching?
- Do they show honour to those in authority? How do they treat their parents, pastor, employer and those in positions above them?
- Do you both love and long to give to each other? Is sacrifice a joy or something you feel obliged or forced to?
- Do you feel safe with them, enough to talk about your inmost dreams, desires and thoughts? Does their presence feel like a safe haven, uncritical, warm, caring, loving and protecting?
Life given us on this earth, is meant to be lived to the fullest. God’s blessing makes one rich [whole, prosperous, fulfilled, joyful and content], and it brings no sorrow with it. Sure enough, life will throw a curve, and we may come to face twists and turns we did not expect at the start, but when your choices are centered on God’s plan for your life, the journey is a whole lot easier and fair-sailing. And even when you have made a mistake or missed a turn (and who hasn’t at some point or other), God who loves you will be there to help, comfort and restore.